Okay, now that all you American tennis addicts are looking at serious withdrawal pains following back-to- back Masters Series events, and you Eurofans are getting out your binoculars and umbrellas for the early clay-court season, let’s take a look at some of the winners and losers (beyond the finalists, of course) in the NASDAQ 100 Masters Series tournament last week.
Winner - Roger Federer:
There’s a larger issue at play here than another ho-hum, mail-it-in Masters Series win. Federer has now won Indian Wells and Miami back-to-back, two years in row. To really put this in context, you have to appreciate the fact that some very astute players and pundits think that winning a Masters Series event, with it’s remarkably deep field, can be as or more difficult than winning a Grand Slam.
I don't agree, but their argument is supportable. In this day of late starts and crowded calendars, playing – and winning – as many as six matches in seven days, as some Masters Series events require, is a truly Herculean feat. Now Federer didn’t have to do anything quite that dramatic (it’s the one-week, 64-draw Masters events that call for that kind of death march), but sill – back-to-back Masters, in back-to-back years, is back-to-front awesome.
Loser – Kim Clijsters
The last time we saw Champagne Kimmy, she came out of an injury break that was supposed to have lasted for weeks upon weeks in just a few days to go do a few splits in something called the Proximus Diamond Games.
She got to the final of that Kimfest masquerading as a tournament, and then promptly declared that she had to return to her sick bed, again for weeks at a time, to - you guessed it! – get over her injuries.
Well, after winning Indian Wells and Miami back-to-back in 2005, she won a grand total of onematch in those events this year, losing to Jill Craybas in round One in Miami.
Winner – Jill Craybas
She took out two seeds (the other one was that world famous Sesame Street character, Klara Koukalova) and took Jie Zheng to three-tough sets in the fourth round. I picked her over Zheng as a winner because Jill’s an American and this is an American website and I’ve got to take the good news where and when I can find it! Props to Zheng, too, of course. . .
Loser – Donald Young
He was double-bageled by Carlos Berlocq of Argentina in round 1. Young is 0-19 in sets on the ATP tour. People: stop giving this kid wild cards to main tour events. You’re killing him.
Winner – Jamea Jackson
She took out Ashley Harkleroad in an All-American War of the Titans and then squeaked by seeded Gisela Dulko (6-4 in the third). She had enough in the tank to take a 6-4 set off Nadia Petrova before the No. 5 seed did a Donald Young on her, double-bageling Jamea in the last two sets. Still - more wild cards for Jamea, please!
Loser – Vince Spadea (see photo)
He schooled Andreas Seppi in round 1. Unforunately, the day before his room was broken into and the thief (who came in via the poolside sliding glass door) got his computer, which included Spadea’s entire contact list and a bunch of raps he was planning to record.
So if you hear Fitty Cent rapping about the lousy Osso Bucco in the player restaurant, you’ll know what happened. . . BTW, the rooms at the Marriot Biscayne Bay are pretty small, but Vinny slept through the entire episode.
Winner – Linespeople
Hawkeye showed that the most maligned and persecuted group in all of tennis (tennis parents and agents aside) were right in their calls far more than they were wrong. Maria Sharapova herself was the loss leader, going a whopping 0-11 on challenges.
Loser – Marcos Baghdatis
Poor guy – gets to the Australian Open final and his reward is getting Rafael Nadal in the quarters of IW and Nikolay “Dooomsday” Davydenko in the third round of Miami.
Winner - Hardcore Tennis Fans
One facet of the current meltdown of U.S. tennis that is being lost on even ardent anti-U.S. Kool-Aid drinkers is that the lack of top American men and women (who play regularly) means that networks, especially tennis-friendly ESPN, are being forced to televise and promote non-U.S. players like never before – and like they never would, if you still had, oh, Agassi, Sampras, either Williams and Davenport as perpetual finalists.
Losers – Venus and Serena Williams
They didn’t bother to show up at their traditional home-court lovefest, but did anyone really notice or care?
Winner – Ancic (the other one, Sanja)
Mario’s kid sister is starting to tickle the buzz-meter; she took Iveta Benesova to 7-6 in the third in Round 1.
Loser – Juan Carlos Ferrero
The only guy he beat at the two Masters is Vince Spadea, once. At least he got a lot of Frequent Flyer miles and nobody robbed his computer.
Winner – Vince Spadea
Lost his stuff but hey, he got to play Juan Carlos Ferraro the week before!
Losers – Mark Knowles and Daniel Nestor
Number 3 seeded doubles team, they lost in Round 1 to Cyril Suk and Pavel Vizner, whose combined age is 143 and who don’t even show up in the media guide.
Winner – Anastasia Myskina
She got to the quarters in Miami, one more step in the long road back. How about those eyes? Yeah, I’m a sexist pig but as long as you’re not Myskina, who cares what you think?
Loser – Richard Gasquet
Kid was supposed to make a lot of noise this year. So far, the silence is deafening. By the end of Miami, he’d won just four matches – one of them in Davis Cup.
Winner – Michaella Krajicek
The 16-year old junior won more matches in her first tournament of the year (she won Hobart, crushing Benesova in the final) than Gasquet has in seven.
Loser – Sania Mirza
Lost round 1 in Miami, making her another four-win wonder this year (see “G” for Gasquet); the Florida loss was especially painful, as it came at the hands of Chris Evert protégé, 5-year old Anna Tatishvili, 6-7(8) in the third. Ouch! And that was a typo – Tatishvili just turned 16.
There’s a real chance that Mirza becomes a victim of her own fame and celebrity, although she’s already guaranteed fabulous wealth and goddess-for-life status on the Indian sub-continent, and among diversity-over-all types, proving that Sharapova Kool-Aid isn't the only kind people lap up. Just depends on the flavor you like, right?
Mirza has a lot of game, but the foundation is shaky and she's under a lot of pressure now that she's a star. Tough combination, that. . .
Winner – Tatiana Golovin
Made a semifinal for the first time since last fall, and won a million hearts by coming back from match points down to push Sharapova to the limit – before going down with torn ankle ligaments while down 4-3 in the third. Contrary to reports, Sharapova did not run around the net and stomp on Tatiana's injured ankle, or Tyson-ize her ear.
Loser – Cara Black and Rennae Stubbs
The number 2 seeds in women’s doubles didn’t win a set in the tournament, losing in Round 1 to Emilie Loit and Nicole Pratt.
Winner – James Blake
Guy made the final at Indian Wells and went deep in Miami, declaring that he’s not the only one who’s watching his buddy Andy Roddick’s back; now Andy is, too.
Loser – Gaston Gaudio
See “F” for Ferrero.
Winner – David Ferrer
This guy is emerging as the grinder’s grinder, stinging Sebastian Grosjean and Andy Roddick enroute to a semifinal lynching by Federer.
Let’s end on a winner’s note, shall we?
And here’s a question for you true geeks and pundits: name the guy who played six matches in seven days, beating a series of players whose averageranking was No. 14 (the victims included, in succession, the No. 2, 3 and 12 studs; this may have been the high-quality run of all time) at a Masters Series event. Hint: If McGuire can do it, so can I!
Gentle(wo)men, start your emails!